Monday, December 13, 2004

New STD - FW: from Chris

-----Original Message-----
From: Christine Scriabine
Sent: Saturday, December 11, 2004 10:12 PM
Subject: CDC Warning

The Centers for Disease Control has issued a warning about a virulent strain of sexually transmitted disease.

This disease is contracted through dangerous and high risk behavior. The disease is called Gonorrhea Lectim. Second generation patterns of the disease have produced an even more virulent strain called Diddreah Lectim.

Many victims have contracted it after having been screwed for 4 years, in spite of having taken measures to protect themselves from this especially troublesome disease.

Cognitive sequelae of individuals infected with Gonorrhea Lectim and Diddreah Lectim include, but are not limited to:

Antisocial personality disorder traits;
delusions of grandeur with a distinct messianic flavor;
chronic mangling of the English language;
extreme cognitive dissonance;
inability to incorporate new information;
pronounced xenophobia;
inability to accept responsibility for actions;
exceptional cowardice masked by acts of misplaced bravado;
uncontrolled facial smirking;
ignorance of geography and history;
tendencies toward creating evangelical theocracies;
a strong propensity for categorical, all-or nothing behavior.

The disease is sweeping Washington. Naturalists and epidemiologists are amazed and baffled that this malignant disease originated only a few years ago in a Texas Bush.


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